EPISODE SIXTEEN -
COWBELL OF HAPPINESS
  LITTLE GIRL: Thought you'd gotten rid of me, didn't you?
  PRINCE: How many times are her parents going to DIE already?
  TV: Hello, and welcome to the Foreshadowing Show! Where our hints are unbelieveably ridiculous, and that's the way we like it!
  UTENA: Himemiya, you're gonna ruin your eyes. How wide is that screen, ten centimeters?
  ANTHY: I'm not watching porn! I'm not!
  UTENA: The Home Shopping Channel is not all that much better.
  KEIKO: Nanami-sama, you look so GORGEOUS!
  AIKO: So... we're lying to her, right? 'Cause... there's no way anyone could think that oufit was stylish.
  KEIKO: Of course. Now hush, I have more toadying to do.
  NANAMI: I am cooler than EVERYONE ON EARTH.
  JURI: Except, naturally, me.
  NANAMI: Oh, BALLS.
  MIKI: Wow, is that logo Sebastian Dior? Outfitter of the British Royal Family? The HEIGHT of luxury? SQUEE!
  JURI: But you're not gay.
  MIKI: I'm WELL READ. Don't you even start.
  NANAMI: Look, everyone and feast your eyes upon my new... radioactive cowbell.
  COWS: Moo.
  JURI: ...I... I have no words.
  MIKI: *whimper*
  UTENA: ...I... she's... with the... what?
  COWS: Moo.
  ANTHY: I'm domestic.
  MIKI: I'm disturbed.
  UTENA: I think Nanami has that effect on everyone.
  TEACHER: Yahooie, someone to harass besides Tenj- what the HELL are you WEARING?
  NANAMI: You're so uncultured.
  COWS: Moo.
  TEACHER: I am not handling this.
  GIRLS: Just when we thought she couldn't get crazier.
  NANAMI: My coolness knows no bounds!
  TSUWABUKI: Did someone say from the mouths of babes? I coulda sworn they di-
  NANAMI: DIE.
  TSUWABUKI: *whimper*
  UTENA: You are a FREAK. Possibly a bigger freak than Saionji.
 

NANAMI: What would a dyke like you know?
  AUTHOR: ::not making that last line up::
  UTENA: I WILL CUT YOU.
  NANAMI: No, Big Brother, don't eat me!
  TOUGA: And there you have number one on the "Top Ten Things Nanami Would Never Say" list, folks.
  BANYU INRYOUKU: Here, have a holocaust song.
  AUDIENCE: ...no, there's no way they actually just did that.
  IKUHARA: BITE ME.
  GIRLS: She's weirder, but at least we aren't fearing for our lives anymore.
  NANAMI: Moo. Also, shut up.
 

TSUWABUKI: NOW did you say from the mouths of-
  NANAMI: I SAID MOO. RAWR.
  KEIKO: She has REAL devil horns now?
  AIKO: We are so screwed.
  NANAMI: MOO.
  TSUWABUKI: I cannot possibly be expected to deal with this on my own.
  UTENA: Have no fear, prepubescent boy! I'll come help y-
  NANAMI: MOO.
  UTENA: -oh HELL no.
  C-KO: Belling the cat has not one thing to do with this. Take THAT, predecessors!
  UTENA: I shall save you!
  COWS: Moo.
  UTENA: By... er.. speaking to you sharply!
  COWS: Moo.
  UTENA: Pay attention, would you?
  COWS: Moo.
  UTENA: Look, you're wearing a freaking cowbell. You look stupid beyond the power of words to express, and you're starting to smell.
  ANTHY: I finished your red, matadoresque present! Isn't it fluttery?
  NANAMI-COW: You know what cows have? HORNS.
  UTENA: This is so very wrong on so very many levels.
  IKUHARA: I AM DELICIOUS AND WELL-SEASONED. BITE AWAY.
  NANAMI-COW: I STAMPEDE YOU!
  UTENA: Fine, then I pitchfork you.
  JURI: Can we never have an episode like this ever again?
  MIKI: Please?
  ANTHY: It's hardly my fault if she keeps wearing accessories for my bovine.
  UTENA: I never thought I'd say this, but I'd like to get back to the nice normal murderous people now.
    IKUHARA: IT'S NOT LIKE I'M GONNA BE BITING MYSELF HERE, PEOPLE.
    END EPISODE SIXTEEN
 

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