Love's Weakness, Part Three
A month went by, and the space they had deserted remained essentially static. On earth, lives were lived, diapers were changed, and food was eaten by those who were unfortunate enough to be the target of the Kyuujinshu and the terrible mission they bore. All unaware, these people continued their mundane but pleasant daily lives, neither knowing nor caring that the very existance of the Real was in danger - and that they had a part in it. When the Kyuujinshu ship finally reappeared in their universe, they never even knew.
Upon successful reentry, the Kyuujinshu ship did not move. It floated in space, much battered, appearing derelict, with no semblence of life or light gracing its long, windowed halls. The reason for this was shockingly simple: almost all the inhabitants were dead.
Ru Sa sat in his private quarters, slumped back against his seat with both arms hanging limply at his sides. At first glance, he almost looked like one of the dead crewmen; but this was not true - after all, if he'd been dead, he would have no longer look like a Saiyan at all. Ru Sa breathed; he still lived. He merely wished that he did not.
Dully, he finally reached forward and depressed a small, red button on his console with the air of a man half asleep.
"Captain's log," he said, then stopped because the empty echo of his voice seemed to rob him of breath. Eyes closed tightly and hunched slightly as if his chest pained him, he tried again. "Captain's log. Dated... September ninth, I think. Year 3002. We've just returned from a Briefs diversion -"
Oh, gods. He'd made a pun.
Dry, mirthless laughter followed that statement, and it sounded so insane that for a moment, Ru Sa failed to realize it was coming from him. Leaning with both elbows on the console, he rubbed his face miserably, quelling the hysterical laughter that wanted to sweep him away - following that would lead to madness - and continued his report.
"We have just returned from a brief diversion to one of the alternate Earth timelines in which we attempted to track down an undamaged copy of Gero's journal. We did that because it looked like we were going to get information on the Black. Well, we succeeded. And now, everybody's dead."
Ru Sa shuddered for a moment, rubbing his eyes with the heels of his hands like a child. "Okay - not everybody. There are about twenty of us left. I haven't really counted - I don't have the guts. It... hurts too much." Silence. Then - "Yes, to anybody who ever listens to this, this sounds real pathetic. You don't know what happened, and I'm talking shit. Over fifty Kyuujinshu dead? All at once? Yeah, it happens. The Black happens. And so does Vejiita's son."
More frightening yet, the sound that followed this statement was a low, feral growl - desperate and subtle, and not at all Saiyan. "Vejiita's son... not only stopped our research. Not only got in the way and kept me from doing what we went there to do.The little fuck CLOSED the shield on us and damaged the ship, and that's how the Black got in to get us... only by ejecting the main portion of the ship did we survive. All we've got left is the heading disc; the larger body... and most of my people... are gone." He slammed his fists down once, hard. "GONE!" Then, as if it had all finally become too much, Ru Sa put his face in his hands, cursed one more time, and wept. It was a horrible, dry sound; the disconsolate weeping of a man who's come too far and been stretched too thin. A man who had - perhaps - lived too long.
"I don't even know why the hell I'm leaving this message," he said, wiping his face and trying to stop his trembling. "Nobody's ever going to hear it. Nobody cares. We're just... one of the many groups that've suffered in this. The only one who has a chance of stopping it, really... or maybe that's part of the grand Joke, too." Bitter. He hung his head, eyes unfocused, unaware of how the sourness of his heart was aging his face. Not that that was an issue; a few moments of concentration would bring it back to normalcy, true - but at the moment, Ru Sa appeared to be an old, weary, embittered man, with no choice but to keep going in complete spite of utter lack of hope.
Ru Sa was silent for a long moment, as if he'd forgotten that the log was still recording. Finally he said, "She's come to me. Every night, she's come to me - even those nights spent with the Briefs w... with Bulma." Silence again. And then, "I think she's come because I'm dead."
Ru Sa did not mean this in a physical sense - he was not insane, although he'd been shaken; Ru Sa had seen his breaking point and successfully backed away. He was referring to his mission; to the state of his soul, to the measure of his hope.
Dead.
Empty.
Gone.
Closing his eyes and with no further regard for the log that was still recording, he let the memories sweep over him in a flood, surrendering to their depths with the kind of relief that comes with mind-numbing alcohol. It was not the most pleasant of escapes, but it WAS an escape; and so, in a ship that was almost empty, Ru Sa sat in his quarters and dreamed.
***
How - in the name of blue hell and every kami that had ever raised a finger - had he gotten HERE?
Fighting. That was it. They'd been fighting, and Ru Sa had done something stupid. Something unutterably, inexcusably, irretrievably stu-
"Ru Sa, what you did should have been impossible for a low class warrior; you are commended," said the general, interrupting Ru Sa's thoughts and blissfully unaware of the surge of unreality this entire situation was bringing his comendee.
Ru Sa wanted to throw up. Really, he did; he was being praised for acting the perfect Saiyan soldier and fighting like all bloody hell because of.... well, a moment of madness. He had blown up a command of Tsufuru, taken out an entire legion of the machines used to create cloud cover, and slalomed through his enemies like a living tornado, all to the great approval of some very influential people, and thus making himself into a local hero. And why? Why had he done this, put in the extra effort, enacted the fighting, lived the momentary insanity resulting in a total and permanent absence of his hard-earned anonymity?
The stupidest of all possible reasons. Kinusayo was in trouble, and he'd gone to help.
Of course. What else would it BE? He sighed, annoyed with himself, annoyed with his hormones (since that had to be the reason - no WAY in hell this was a conscious decision), annoyed with Kinusayo, and annoyed most of all with this ceremony.
Actually, that was not true; the most annoying thing was that Ru Sa could not for the life of him understand why he had done it. Sure, it was a stressful time being stranded in that cave like that, and she WAS one of the few beings alive who managed to not get on his nerves - good conversationalist, even better cook - but STILL. Battle stress. That had to be it. Battle fatigue and too much sun. Or something.
"Do you hear me, soldier?"
"Hai, Daishou," Ru Sa replied with a bow, answering his general using the proper Saiyan title. Why? Well, why the hell not? This could hardly get any worse.
Some impish, evil part of his mind suggested that if he chose to change his form right now and blast out through the walls to freedom it would be terribly funny - just for the looks on their faces, if nothing else. However, he did not; and why he did not was just as much of a mystery as why he had gotten himself into this situation in the first place. Further annoyed, he let his eyes wander, taking in the rest of the crowd.
Kinusayo was off to the side, in the front row about three quarters of the way up the aisle. And she... No. This was NOT happening. She was SNICKERING at him. Oh, gods, what had he done to deserve this....
"Then it's settled," said the general, looking quite pleased with himself, and Ru Sa blinked. Eh? Settled? WHAT was settled?
A random peon came up and pasted a new insignia to the chestplate of Ru Sa's armor, then stepped back to review his handiwork. Ru Sa had just been promoted.
He stared at his symbolic rank of captain for several seconds until he realized exactly what this meant. The other soldiers were all smiling at him, quite pleased, expecting him to be pleased, and again he had the thought of turning into something truly bizarre and flying out the window.
There was a general cheer and murmer of assent, and Ru Sa was dismissed. Feeling shellshocked, he started back down the aisle, not really aware of Kinusayo pacing him until she grabbed his arm.
"Congratulations - captain," she commented snidely before running lithely past, laughing at him outright as she jogged head. Ru Sa glared after her.
"Shut UP, Kinu," he shouted. "This is your fault! I don't want this thing..."
"You have it, nevertheless. Deal," she shouted back at him, waved, and ran off.
Ru Sa hissed after her. This was not FAIR...
Okay. So it was true that the two of them and a few other people had been trapped in a sort of seige in one of the many mountain passes that divided the Tsufuru from the Saiyans. It was true that they'd not expected to find factions within the Tsufurujin who actually WANTED them dead, as it was also true that they had not expected to find themselves in the middle of a pointy-eared, blue-skinned civil war.
All of those things had been unexpected. But what made it worse was that from the beginning, Fate had thrown him and that little imp Kinusayo together - no matter how he fought it - and only the gods knew why.
It had been three months since Ru Sa had first encountered Kinu - notably on the planet where they were stranded, and then in the regen tank afterwards because her comrades had beat her to shit. It had only taken about a week to get help and get off the planet; by the time they'd arrived home, Ru Sa had already forgotten Kinusayo existed and instead was thinking about making a new life.
This was really quite a pain; it was easy to reshape his appearance to be someone else, but then he'd have no money, no possessions, nothing. And at the rate things were going, his clothing and everything else would definitely been recognized by his very strange and rapidly growing fanclub. This meant that if he were going to start from scratch, he'd REALLY be starting from scratch.
That sucked. To put it mildly.
Not quite to the point yet where he was willing to forgo all he had for anonymity, Ru Sa went to the medical center, had himself cleaned up and checked over, showered, and then marched to his room with full intent of just sleeping for the next three days. With luck, when he awoke, he'd know what he wanted to do with his future.
He did not expect to find a roommate.
Saiyan quarters in this section of town were less than luxurious; really, they were no more than army bunkers, set up for quick dispersal of monkey-muscle and ease of living in between wars. Ru Sa HAD his own apartment elsewhere; he was coming here because after the week he'd had, he needed some peace - and since everybody knew that sleeping soldiers were best left alone, he was guaranteed quiet. This is why when he opened the door and found general Vejiita himself glaring up at him - pointy beard and all - it took him a moment to get his brain back into the proper gear for dealing with hot-headed Saiyans.
"At least bow, you low class moron," general Vejiita said, not yet king Vejiita, but still just as bossy. Ru Sa remembered himself, did NOT blast the annoying little shrimp, and bowed at the waist.
"Gomen nassai," he apologized, not making eye contact because he just didn't feel like LOOKING submissive.. "Is there something with which I may help you, general?"
General Vejiita stroked his goatee - an annoying habit - and eyed him. "You have been in my command for... how long now, Ru Sa?"
Well, this was a surprise; the high-and-mighty-short general knew his name. "For six months, my lord," he said, remaining bowed. It was beginning to put a crick in his back.
"Un," said Vejiita intelligently, and strode up to Ru Sa. Putting one finger under his chin, the general made Ru Sa straighten enough to look him in the eye. Ru Sa inhaled softly; he was good at reading minds, better at reading hearts, and what he saw here...
...none of the dull-eyed slackness that so personified most lower class Saiyans and too many of the upperclass. There was none of the blind lust for fighting; no stupidity; no impatience. What Ru Sa saw in this general's eyes was pure, deadly, intelligent lust for power, and the the will to make it happen. What he saw was raw potential.
"Whoah," Ru Sa said, not really meaning to think out loud, and Vejiita snorted.
"Idiot," he said, releasing Ru Sa's chin. "Stand upright; you're probably giving yourself a back ache." He proceeded to pace around Ru Sa a few times, eyeing the taller man up and down in his be-toweled, post shower state, and keeping his thoughts to himself. Ru Sa straightened as asked and amused himself by thinking that if the current people in power weren't careful, this little general was going to overthrow them all. Heh - wouldn't THAT be fun. Coup! ...well, revolutions WERE fun to be in if you had no personal stakes involved...
"I have an assignment for you," Vejiita interrupted, unaware of Ru Sa's current bloodied train of thought.
"Aw, man, I just got BACK - " Ru Sa started, immediately slipping into the whining, lower-class accent and body language of the role he was currently assuming, and not at all expecting Vejiita to slap him across the face.
Which is just what the shorter man did.
Vejiita scowled at him, eyes narrow. "Don't you DARE pretend to be lazy and stupid with me," he snapped, eyes blazing and retribution promised in every syllable. "We've having this conversation because I know you are neither lazy NOR stupid - less so than you should be - and if you pull shit like that with me again, I am GOING to kill you."
....okay. Well...
Right.
"All right," Ru Sa said, eyeing Vejiita back now with as much scrutiny as he had received a moment ago. "May I ask what the hell prompted you to say that, sir?"
Vejiita snorted and looked down his nose at Ru Sa - which, given his height, was a minor miracle. "Never you mind," he said, resuming his pacing. "Suffice it to say I've been watching and assessing all my soldiers lately - and I have an assignment for you."
Second time he'd said that. Well, crap; no rest for this wearied Kyuujinshu, apparently...
"This is Kinusayo," said Vejiita, and waved vaguely at the right corner of the room near the door. Ru Sa turned.
The girl he'd last seen bleeding her guts out in a regen tank beceause her own men had beat her almost to death waved at him merrily and waggled her eyebrows.
"What..."
"I want you to train her," Vejiita said, still looking down his nose and now adding self-satisfaction to his expression.
"You want me to WHAT?" Ru Sa said, momentarily getting bizarre images of just what this training entailed; well, it wouldn't be the first time he'd worked with whores, but STILL...
Vejiita eyed him dryly. "Don't make me revise my opinion of you, idiot," he said, almost using that term like a nickname. "She's an offworlder, and doesn't fit in here yet; but I think she needs to. In fact, I demand it. It's your job to make her. Do you have that, soldier?"
Ru Sa blinked slowly. He felt a very dangerous bubble of laughter threatening to rise to the surface. "You want me," he said slowly, making sure, "to train her... to be a Saiyan."
"In essence, yes," Vejiita said, and Ru Sa couldn't help it any longer; he burst out laughing.
Vejiita let him laugh; his expression did not change, and he even kept his tail calm and smooth. When it looked like Ru Sa was done, he said, "I don't want you to question me. Just do it." With that, he walked - strode, really, like a king - past Ru Sa and out of the room. He shut the door behind him.
Kinusayo cleared her throat. "Yo," she said conversationally, and pointed at the bunkbed. "Top or bottom?" she asked, and something about the glint in her eyes showed that she knew exactly what innuendo she was using - as well as what Ru Sa's earlier thought about "training" had entailed.
Ru Sa glared. "Fight you for it," he said, out of petulance more than fulfilling his role as lower class Saiyan.
Kinu's tail switched back and forth a little, like a cat's; she tapped her chin. "Mmm," she said thoughtfully. "No." And with a smile, she ran past him like an elf and hopped onto the top bunk. "This way, if the thing falls, you won't crush me." And she smiled.
Ru Sa was too tired to deal with this. "If... what, you're not even going to ask my OPINION?"
"Senseeeei," the girl said, flopping onto her stomach and batting her eyelashes. "Do you want me dead?"
"Maybe," he growled, vaguely wondering where he'd put his clothes.
"Oh. Then perhaps I SHOULD be on the bottom - assuming you want to take the lead?" she said, a truly incensing grin creeping along her face.
Okay; she was getting WAY too much joy out of this.
"Shut. Up," Ru Sa said, grabbed his uniform, and stalked out of the room. He could swear he felt her eyes on him as he left; oh, good GODS, what a mess. He - a Kyuujinshu - train some offworld, smart mouthed brat to be a Saiyan? What the hell was Vejiita THINKING?
Who knew; maybe the little shrimp thought it was funny. Ru Sa's comrades were going to think it was funny; Cabbage and the rest of them... ugh. He'd NEVER live this one down...
Trying to think of how he was going to deal with this, Ru Sa pulled on his clothing in the other room, determined to at least get a good night's sleep before dealing with his new burden.
Ru Sa started awake at the gentle touch of a female hand on his shoulder; Chive was shaking him awake. Upon making eye contact, the first thing she did was point at the console.
"If you are going to let the log record empty air, captain," she said cooly, "perhaps you might want to do it when you are NOT snoring in the room."
Ru Sa sighed and rubbed his face; he'd actually fallen asleep. Well, that went a long way toward showing how tired he was. "Un," he muttered, switching off the console and rising stiffly to go to bed. It was obvious he needed some real sleep, not just a nap.
"The first phase has been accomplished," Chive said, following the sleepy captain down the hall toward his bedchamber. "Bulma has been poisoned and the living habits of all the others have been mapped out."
"Un," he said again, not willing to have to think right now. Rubbing one eye tiredly, he opened the door to his quarters and stumped in a beeline for his bed.
"Phase two is now in action," Chive said, following him to tuck him in as he lay down. "And it is time for your shot."
Ru Sa sighed. "Later, Chive," he said, letting her care for him and already drifting to sleep. "... 'll take care of it later."
"If you're sure," she said, and now there was gentleness in her tone - as she gave to no other. She loved him; only the gods knew why. He cared for her, certainly, but it wasn't LOVE...
He knew what love was like. Whatever he had for Chive... that wasn't it.
"Call me when phase three is ready," he mumbled, and with that, went back to sleep and to the arms of his dreams.
Chive stood where she was for a moment, brushing back some of his hair and studying his face with a warmth that would have startled her crewmates if they'd seen.
"Good night, captain," she said softly, and left, turning out the lights. And Ru Sa's mind, possibly responding to the dark, threw his memory back to where it had been last - plus three days - to the cave where he had almost died and where his behavior had guaranteed his commendation and medal of honor.
"There wasn't really a choice. Was there." The soldier's voice was tired, raspy, and more than a little dry.
"No. There wasn't. Least we got those bastards where it counted," another voice answered, similarly anonymous in the dark. There was only one campfire, and if the voice's owner was not sitting near it, then said owner could not be seen. Simple as that.
It had been three days since Ru Sa and Kinusayo had been forced together as roommates. This was their first mission together - and of course, Vejiita had seen to it that they were in the same team. Kinusayo sat along the outer wall, closest to the entrance and barely reached by the light of the flames. She was holding her canteen in one hand and resting her other arm on her upraised knee. Her look said the the other speakers were entirely negligible; she appeared amused, slightly haughty, condescending and sarcastic. Almost in rebuttal to them, she took a swig from her canteen.
"You really shouldn't do that." Ru Sa sat across from her. The air was better near the entrance, and if the Tsufuru-jin were close enough to pick up their life readings and blast them from here, then nowhere in the cavern was safe anyway.
"I know, I know. Conservation of water. Etc. And so forth. Screw it," she added brightly and took another sip. Then, having made her point, she re-capped her canteen and slung it over her shoulder.
Ru Sa snorted. "Freak," he muttered, looking back toward the entrance. It had been twenty four hours since they'd been holed up in here - and Saiyans, as a rule, did not do well without food. Ru Sa and a few of the elites were doing all right, but everybody else was more than exhausted. Some of the weaker Saiyans, in fact, had already given up trying to move.
Kinusayo, on the other hand, seemed to be doing fine. "The way I figure it," she said, even though Ru Sa hadn't asked, "We'll be out of here in another day. Or two. At most." And she took another swig.
Ru Sa glanced at her, irritated that she'd chosen to talk. "So?" he said, debating whether fresh air was worth an annoying companion. "I don't think they care about your schedule, little girl."
Kinusayo snorted. "Kinusayo. Kinu. Idiot, if we're going to be roommates you could at least ATTEMPT to learn my name."
Well, that did it. Ru Sa stood to go; there was no reason for him to put up with sarcastic monkeys any more than he had to...
Casually, she said, "I'm right," and something about her tone wormed its way under Ru Sa's skin so that he felt positively compelled to turn back around and answer her. Of course, the moment he did she was wearing an absolutely smug look on her face, as though that was exactly what she'd expected him to do.
"I'm riiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiight," she sing-songed.
Ru Sa stared.
"Riiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiight," she said again, much, much quieter, as if in an echo. And oh, the shit-eating grin she was wearing...
"Who the hell CARES if you're right?" Ru Sa bellowed, then was immediately shocked at himself for doing so. He was letting a twenty-something year old IDIOT get under his skin...
Okay, Ru. You're more mature than this.
Giving her what he hoped was a thoroughly dismissive look, he turned around and walked away. Her laughter followed him. Well, that was one person whose company he could afford to miss. "Right," indeed...
It didn't occur to him to ask why she had thought that. It occurred to him the next day, however, so - telling himself he was only going over there for the sake of the fresh air - he went to ask her.
She was still sitting in the same place, ironically enough taking another sip of water as he went by.
"Isn't your canteen empty yet?" he snapped, plopping down to take a seat across from her.
"Nope," she said, sounding congenial enough, and continued to look toward the entrance. They sat there for a while, silhouetted in the bright sunlight and unconsiously mimicking one another's positions. The silence was surprisingly comfortable; Ru Sa found himself almost loathe to break it.
"So why do you think you're right?" he finally said, not looking at her.
"Ah. A repeat customer," she said obscurely. "Simple enough. The Tsufuru are weak. I don't mean their bodies; I mean their minds. They are sentimental and foolish, in spite of their superior intellects. Because of that, they'll feel pity for us and won't let us starve - we'll either be taken in and become prisoners of war, or they'll just let us go with lots of warnings. This is because they're acutally stupid enough to believe that someday we'll learn from them, and stop this pointless fighting. Good enough?"
Ru Sa glanced at her sidelong, not having expected an answer so well-thought-out. "Ah, so?" he said.
"Ah, so," she confirmed with only a little sarcasm.
Ru Sa continued to look at her. "And I suppose you wouldn't do it that way?" he said dryly. Of course she would; as if any Saiyan would choose occupation over supremacy...
"Damn straight," she confirmed, either missng the humor or deciding to play along with it. "I'd march in there and rip all their bloody fucking heads off."
....okay. That level of violence was unexpected. Ru Sa turned his face slightly to look at her more fully. "You have a personal vendetta?"
"Nope," she said, not looking at him at all. "I just like to rend things." And she smiled at him, hand out, her thumb pointed skywards in the traditional "okay" position.
Ru Sa stared for one more moment, and then he began to laugh. She had a turn of phrase he hadn't encountered on this planet before. Kinusayo glanced at him once, smirked lightly, and resumed looking out the cave entrance to the tempting sunlight beyond.
The ice broken, Ru Sa allowed himself to look at her fully for the first time. Something about her definitely seemed older than she actually was; the set of her expression, even her smile - when she wasn't actively teasing - seemed almost... jaded. She took another sip.
Ru Sa frowned. "You haven't run out of water yet?"
"Of course not," she said. "I grew up on a desert planet. I know how to handle my drink." She winked at him, then seemed to consider. "That was a really stupid joke," she said mournfully, pondering herself for delivering such a line.
Heh. Well, really, he should have expected that; in Ru Sa's experience, the off-worlders tended to be more... civilized. Go figure - one would think that growing up on their own after having destroyed all sentient life would make them more barbaric.
"What planet?" he asked, just making conversation. Aye, the sunlight looked good; bright, clear, and reflecting off the heat-waves that rose from the dirt. It would be a relief to get out of here, one way or another.
"Doesn't matter. It's not there any more," she offered, and left it at that.
"...ah, so." Well, there didn't seem to be much else to say. He continued in silence. Oddly enough, Kinusayo seemed quite comfortable with long silences; perhaps that, too, came from being alone for so long....
"Captain."
The voice was distant enough that it took a moment to register. It had nothing to do with his present reality, nothing to do with the dreams that were presently clogging his mind.
"Captain. Captain - are you awake?"
Ru Sa grunted and peeked one eye open. In a moment, everything registered; his place was the time-jumping spaceship, his goal was earth for the second time, and the young man interrupting him was Cumber. Well. He wasn't young...
"What, Cumber?" he asked, sitting up all the way and stretching out his back. "Is there a problem?"
"Ah, no. Phase three is ready to go into operation, and Chive said... she said to come wake you," he said shyly, as if the very mention of Chive was enough to curl his toes.
Ru Sa sighed. "Cumber, do you REALIZE how obvious you are?" he snapped, swinging his legs out of the bed.
"...huh?" said Cumber.
"Never mind," Ru SA said grumpily, and stood. "So phase three is ready?"
"Yes, sir," Cumber said, bowing slightly. Ru Sa nodded.
"Very well. I'll be in the bridge in half an hour. Go tell the others."
"Yes, sir," he said again, and with a sharp, military bow, left. Cumber watched him as he exited the room; pretty, Cumber was, although that was not intentional. He was too... slim, too lithe to be Saiyan. No one in their right mind would think he was a Saiyan.
In fact, Ru Sa sometimes wondered if Cumber's not-Saiyanness was part of what tipped King Vejiita off to their presence in the first place.
Ah well, that was contemplation for later. Sighing again and steeling himself for a long day, Ru Sa showered and left his room, bed unmade. His report was still unfinished, but that was all right. He'd have plenty of chances to do it after Vejiita and Vejiita's followers had been picked up and questioned; after that... they'd have all the time in the world.